i think i had gone through such a big obstacle this time. saya buntu. i have no idea at all of what  i am dealing with.Seem like i just meet the end road. oh, hati saya tidak tenang. There is a voice in my mind. i can't figure out what actually is all about.  The true is I AM NOT HAPPY WITH MY Lifeee. This fucking feeling just make me sick.

i can say that i did not know how to socialize myself with those people in uni. saya tidak faham gurauan mereka. Saya tidak mengerti akan cara pemikiran mereka.kehidupan mereka, background mereka. penghujungnya, saya tidak tahu bergaul dengan mereka.and this serious thing is, im exhausted man! penat mahu melayan perasaan ini.

well, i am just a ordinary girl. sometime i do act typically. but why i find it hard for me to bergaul and understand with those people. KENAPA??  saya LOSER bukan.

i try to dig around for a solution. i failed for that. And i started to think. since primary sehingga la high school saya hanya rapat degan kawan yang berbangsa bukan melayu. i can just name you, all my friend list are all chinese and indian. hanya segelintir melayu sahaya yang hadir dalam kehidupan saya ketika di bangku sekolah. TETAPI all of them are just link to me. saya happy dengan kehidupan saya. but after i left my high school, saya macam mengalami kejutan budaya. i find ouT cara and life style begitu ketara which i have difficulties to cope with it. serious saya sangat LOSER. 
OK.enough saying. saya patut fikir positive.
i guess ALLAH amat sayang saya . DIA hanya mahu menguji saya. jadi i have to proof that i can walk it through.

i love my bff. AHLAM. i think i have enough because i have her in my life. <3

mencari kekuatan. finally saya PULANG.

decided. i skip 3 classes this week to be home earlier than what i have planed before.

so, here i am blogging with extra super comfort surrounding which is my home.

since primary next to high school and continue with university life i never play with my attendance to classes. i would never simply skip or ponteng my classes with a strong or relevant reason. but this time i just lost my way. i lost in my own world. and all i need to do is to recharge my so called  angah's body battery. Therefore, rumah is the destination and parents is the charger to my body's battery. 

 few days back since my laptop past away i felt so depressed. i can simply say that i live in a lifeless life. All my works can't be settle down. i can't study well as all the notes are in the lappy, i have no entertainment that can entertain me, i lost contact with all my friends and i can't even update myself with all the latest news. hidup diibaratkan seperti katak dibawah tempurung. seriously,  virtual life can create a great effect in our daily life.

my mood start to swing. i'm not in a good mood for all day long. my life affected totally. kecian kepada kawan-kawan saya yang kene deal dengan saya yang bermasalah ini. SORRY ye kawan-kawan. 

so currently in parents place. hati berbunga girang. hidup kembali seceria dulu. perut sentiasa kekeyangan, tidur malam-malam diulit mimpi-mimpi indah. wahh. betapa indah berda di rumah. HOME SWEET HOME.

p/s; esk entri saya bakal berbau negative.

maulidur rasul!

mari  bernasyid sambil mengigati NABI kita.
p/s:  thanks to IFANITA for lending me her laapy.! =)

memaklumkan disini bahawasanya LAPTOP saya rosak.  

so. selamat tinggal wahai dunia maya.

will meet you after abah send my new lappy. 

SIGH!

brand new me.

I hope this would not be too late for me to berikrar janji dengan diri sendiri to start all over- THE BRAND NEW ME. I just get back from my short and sweet holiday and I really need to work super duper hard throughout this semester. I need to always remind myself that no matter hard that i need to survive , how bad I miss my hometown, how bad I need to crack my mind and how much I need to deal with this non-enjoyment life I will definitely can walk it through. Because ALLAH knows well. HE give us the difficulties because HE believe that we are capable to cope with it..
So, zuraini please bear in your mind. Redha, Tawakal, thinks positive and also please less sigh-ing after this.

Bak kata my besties AHLAM. Kita kena muhasabah diri setiap hari. So that we are always on the right track and will never loss control in matter to achieve the goodness.

Well, ye saya setiap hari berjanji dengan diri sendiri untuk menjadi yang terbaik in every single aspect.
Yes I know.. the same old me who always use to said that she’s gonna be extraordinary , the girl who say will put extra and moreee effort to her study, will always promising that she will be tougher and stronger and not more HOMESICK and ect ect ect.. but never be the same toward the end. I am hoping when I awake next morning I will never be the same girl again. I WANT TO CHANGE MYSELF.
Have a sneak peak on my daily time table. I guess a hectic one. So, all I wanna do right is set up my mind. Be a positive thinker. Never look back. You really can do this ZURAINI.!!!!!!!!

Ya allah please guide me. Ease everything. GOOD NIGHT PEOPLE. love

HOME.

So currently at my uni. thanks to Chinese New Year for giving me the opportunity to be at home and also let all the fatty/lemak come and stick at my body. grrr!!
unfortunately, all the joyfulness of being home is meet the end. owh, masa sangat cepat berlalu if only im home. kalau di uni i swear this will not gonna happen. =(

rumahku syurgaku. well, this is kinda sooo true. home really can give you everything. you can always find your LOVE. the MARVELOUS ever food. the awesome excitement. a great shelter against heat.cold,rain,invaders,enemies,etc. home simply like heaven. ALL IN ONE. you can find all the goodness hanya di rumah. it Does not matter on how the house have to be. either rumah kayu, rumah batu, rumah flat, rumah setinggan even a palace. tetapi kawan. don't get me wrong. you will experience all this if and only penghuni di dalam sesebuah rumah itu mengamalkan cara hidup yang sedemikian. i mean, in every house there should be one feller that need to monitor the house. ala-ala macam ibu kita la. dia menjaga kebersihan, makan minum dan lain-lain keperluan. when your house is neat and tidy plus all the members are also contributing to create the positive environment secara tidak langsung you will fell home is the best ever place to live on.

so, my home simply heaven. i do enjoy myself when im home. i did not felt any uneasy feeling when im home.